Lessons from Nazare

I believe that one of the most significant markers of emotional intelligence is having a flexible mind. The ability to accept that things might not happen the way you wished for, but trusting that everything happens the way it's meant to be. 

But learning to accept the flow of life fully is easier said than done. 

Going to Nazare taught me these lessons. Nazare is a very special place, rich in history. It is located on the coast of Portugal, a few hours away from Lisbon. The mix of the fishing culture, the European low-key lifestyle, and the occasional hundred-foot waves make the place very unique.

Every time I come to Nazare, time slows down. For some reason, I am fully present and completely immersed in the place. There is something about the energy of the place that either captivates you and lures you in or kicks you out.

In my case, I got lured in, and as I dug deeper into the essence of Nazare, I was forced to dig deeper into myself. The lessons I’ve learned there are so clear and vivid that there is no way of denying the message behind them.

I feel like my Nazare experience is almost mystical as if I went there not to surf big waves, but to understand things about myself. 

Last year, my lesson was given to me by the ruthless shorebreak. I battled the shorebreak every morning in order to make it to the surf. I cried and got denied multiple times.

During my last days there, I understood it was never me against the shorebreak. It was me against my mind and my fears. The shorebreak was the medium for me to understand the lesson. 

After that humbling experience, a new fire was ignited in me. My love for big wave surfing was back. 

At some point in my surfing career, I started thinking I was a fake. I wasn’t sure about my motives and my desire with big wave surfing. But, after battling that cold shorebreak every morning, I knew there was no chance any fake person could have endured that torture. 

This year, I wanted to focus on tow surfing, and I had the opportunity to use my sponsor's jet skis and train with a driver. ,

I planned this trip for over a year, and yet nothing happened according to the plan. The entire time was forced to adapt to new, unpredictable situations.

Two days after I arrived, there was going to be a huge swell. The afternoon before the big swell arrived, I was testing my equipment and practicing with my driver. I had a terrible first session. I was not sure about my equipment, and I was not connecting with my driver, which is a recipe for disaster.

The training ended quickly, and I left the water feeling overwhelmed about the big day. 

I lost all my confidence and had to change my plan quickly. 

The driver and surfer connection is the most important relationship you will ever have in tow- surfing. Not only do you trust each other with your life, but the synchronicity between the two of you is a must. It’s a relationship, the best way I can explain it is unconditional love.

After that session, I knew my driver and I weren’t a match for each other. I cried in the sand and decided to see the bright side of the situation. It took us twenty minutes to figure out we were not a good match. I had lost nothing but my expectations.

This situation is very common in Nazare, and many partners and even lovers decide to work with different people. It is very understandable as there is so much pressure and so much adrenaline to manage, especially when you enter the world of elite big-wave surfing.

Now, I had six hours to process the turn of events and make a new plan. I realized maybe the purpose of this person appearing in my life was not to be my forever driver but to give me the confidence to enter this crazy world and maybe one day become an elite driver myself. 

I stopped crying and said thank you to this person and held him with love and respect in my heart because if it weren’t for this person, I would have never made it to Nazare.

And that's when the plot twist happened. 

I got the opportunity to train with “Alemao de Maresias,” one of the best drivers of all time (according to every elite driver). And a new journey began. 

He wasn’t my first choice, because he is a very busy man and I wasn’t his choice at all. 

Who wants the responsibility of showing a beginner how to drive and tow surf in huge waves? 

But, slowly but surely, I think I won his heart. 

The lessons didn’t end there. 

I encountered so many difficulties but decided to focus on the positives overall. It is extremely rare that a person with no knowledge gets to be part of an elite team in Nazare, and it's even more rare that I got to have jet skis to use. 

I knew I had to remember this entire experience was something that was being lent to me. That helped me keep a very grateful heart during my whole experience. 

Most of the days, my driver could only take me out to practice in the most challenging conditions. But in every single one of those sessions, there was a beautiful, amazing wave waiting for me. 

On the last day of my training, I thought I showed up late and was very sad because I knew the waves were perfect and I was missing out. But I was right on time for my wave to come. I surfed probably one of the best waves I had ever gotten in my life, and then I understood these two things.

First, not everyone walks in your life to stay forever. Most people are just passing by. But everyone who crosses paths with you has a valuable lesson for you to learn. The hard part is understanding what the lesson is and what you can learn from it.

Second, expectation is a great enemy created by the mind. There is not a good time or a wrong time, things happen when they are meant to happen. And in most cases, great things happen when you least expect it.